First of all, the original story of Chicken Little only takes about three pages of a book to tell. Don't get me wrong, Disney's done a tremendous job before of transitioning such short stories into film, but Chicken Little gets it done within the first two minutes. Movie over, right? God, I wish... Anywho, after the whole "sky-is-falling" fiasco, Chicken Little (Zach Braff) has become the town joke, ostracized so much that even his father (Garry Marshall) suggests that he basically turn invisible so that the whole world can forget about the incident... what an asshole. The next twenty minutes are spent with Chicken Little and his friends Abby Mallard (Joan Cusack), Runt-of-the-Litter (Steve Zahn) and Fish-out-of-Water (a water cooler) as they go through thier daily strife at school, from being bullied by Foxy Loxy (Amy Sedaris) to being pummeled at dodgeball. Little decides to change his image by joining the baseball team and actually scoring a home run by sheer dumb luck. As soon as he becomes a hero and rekindles his relationship with his dad, something falls out of the sky and hits Little in the head again. It seems it's a piece of the sky in the shape of an hexagon which turns out to be part of an alien spaceship that perfectly camouflages itself with the surrounding environment.After the four investigate the ship, they think that the aliens are going to destroy Earth. Little once again tries to prove this to the townspeople but the aliens escape before he can show the town. Once again. the town thinks he's delusional only to find out he was right the next day. But it's not an takeover per-se, it's a rescue mission because two of the aliens lost their son. After much panic, Little and his dad make up and give the kid back to it's parents only to find that they were just looking for an acorn harvest... again, I'm not making this up! The town calls Little a hero and the film ends by watching a Hollywood version of what we just saw an hour ago. Hippety-friggin-ray!
(*sigh*) Where do I begin? Let's start with the story because on paper, it has a promising premise. The problem is that it's not executed well at all. The original story is done in two minutes followed by an extra twenty minutes of padding it with a pointless baseball game, toilet humor, and pointless, painful pop-culture references that just pop out of thin air. It takes thirty minutes to get the main plot going. Thirty minutes! It just felt like the film was never going to end! On top of that, it's just obnoxious. A lot of it is just characters screaming, running around, and singing songs that aren't original, but top billboard songs that all the adults watching this wanted out of their heads years ago. And in karaoke style too. Oh, joy-bunnies!
Pure ear-sodomy! X(
|You can collect them all in each McDonald's Happy Meal!|
|I bet poor Don regretted doing this after he died...|
|Oh, I see! Just because Mickey's a Disney icon and it's an alien's watch, |
it's automatically funny! Haha... GOD, F@%* THIS MOVIE WITH A $!@#$*& AND )(*E$#! UP ITS #@$!